7 Types Of Fake Friends We Need To Recognize
False friends are like the dark side of the moon. At the beginning, they amaze us with their charm and their kind attentions then, little by little, we guess this other facet where the cavities of an interested character are hidden. This sterile and desolate affectivity which, almost without our realizing it, undermines our mood. These are profiles that we must know how to identify as early as possible to preserve our emotional health.
It is often said that friendship is the best ingredient in life. Love is too, there is no doubt about it, but what a good friend brings often transcends the bonds of emotional and family relationships. Thus, this fabric built on the basis of complicity, common experiences and intense confidence is what brings us an eternal source of energy and, above all, a better quality of life.
Despite everything, it is inevitable to meet, from time to time, one of those specimens so common in our social contexts, where interest and selfishness are camouflaged under the covering of the most luminous of friendships. And we fall into this trap. Sure. Because with our natural innocence, we do not hesitate for a moment to believe that the goal of all good friendship is to bring happiness, support and well-being.
Until the drama happens. Disappointments appear, with their share of little lies, constant contempt and cryptic manipulations. Whether we like it or not, we are faced with one of those false friends that we did not see coming but that we have to get rid of as quickly as possible, for our own good and our dignity …
1. Types of false friends: the social mountaineer
One of the first false friends we meet very early in our life is the “social mountaineer”. We find it in elementary school, middle school, high school, university classrooms and, of course, in our professional environments.
Social mountaineers are those who form friendships for one reason only: to climb the ladder of social context. So, at school, it is common to see them seeking proximity to the most popular students or those with the best grades. Later, in the professional field, they have no qualms about humiliating and manipulating others in order to climb the ranks.
2. The friend who is there in good times and disappears in bad
This type of false friendship is surely very familiar to us. We are talking about those people who are always there in times of calm and well-being, who are there for any activity, party, getaway or last minute proposal. However, when a problem arises or we experience a bad situation in which we would like to receive their support and a sign of interest, they disappear like the wind when a window is closed …
3. The one who looks for mistakes and judges you
If there is one thing that characterizes the healthiest friendship, it is its ability to provide us with well-being at all times. A true friend makes us feel good thanks to his presence, he guarantees us not to judge or criticize ourselves and, after several hours spent in his company, we can be sure to leave in better shape …
However, this does not happen with false friends; with them we come home feeling even worse than before. In fact, there is one type of false friend that abounds: the one who spends their time looking for faults in us, drawing our attention to the smallest little mistake we make (or not) and continuously judging ourselves. This type of dynamic generates considerable emotional wear and tear.
4. The one who envies you silently or openly
“You always do everything right”, “these things never happen to you”, “you are always lucky”… These types of sentences are the ones that those false friends usually repeat to us who, deep down, of their being, envy us.
However, in this case, it reveals above all a low self-esteem of these people, which pushes them to interact in an unhealthy way with the others.
5. The one who wants things to be good for you, but not better than for him
This trait of false friendship is as curious as it is usual. It manifests itself in the following way: we have, by our side, people who motivate us to surpass ourselves, to achieve things but, when that happens, instead of feeling happy for us, they distance themselves or themselves. annoy.
Behind these kinds of situations, we once again find low self-esteem. These people will feel more comfortable with us as long as we are at their level and experience the same conditions. Any sign of success or surpassing oneself brings them to light, plunges them into contradiction and discomfort.
6. The rival disguised as a “best friend”
If you buy yourself a laptop, be sure that a friend of yours will be looking to get an even better one. If you sign up for the gym, be careful! He or she will do the same to exceed your goals. His goal: to be better than you in all areas, in all the goals you set for yourself, in all the successes you achieve.
These false friends act as our reflection, as a shadow that pursues us and wants revenge by seeking to be better than us at any level in our life.
7. The one who manipulates you
The Manipulative Friend is that low-key but relentless specimen who, almost without our realizing it, ties puppet strings to our arms so that he can do whatever he wants with us for a while. He will sometimes resort to victimization, emotional blackmail or deception. In short, he will use an infinite number of Machiavellian strategies to have you within his reach and to get what he wants at all times.
To conclude, as we can guess, there are many more types of false friends: the one who criticizes, the one who betrays, the one who spreads gossip… We could describe a large number of typologies but the most important, in addition to to identify them is to know how to manage them.
Sometimes we don’t necessarily have to sever that link. It is enough to explain things clearly, to set limits and, why not, to promote the personal development and the self-esteem of this friend so that he is able to forge healthier bonds.
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