Self-esteem And Ego: 7 Differences

It is possible that some people still believe that self-esteem and ego are synonymous concepts. This is something totally understandable if we take into account the fact that from a very young age we have been taught to think of others rather than of ourselves. Even in adulthood, looking after yourself can be called self-centeredness and selfishness.

Still, what happens when we confuse self-esteem with ego? When we put the needs of others before our own, when we seek external approval and feel guilty when we want to say “no” but have to say “yes” so as not to be seen as selfish.

The main consequence of this confusion is the disconnection with our needs,  since we forget to listen to ourselves and, therefore, to value ourselves as it should be. This is why we will see here 7 differences between self-esteem and ego.

1. Self-admiration

A person with a large ego exhibits excessive self-admiration. So much so that she develops narcissistic characteristics and observes the world from a distorted perspective. The major problem with this type of people is that they think they are superior to others, that is, they consider themselves perfect and everything they do as well.

In contrast,  a person with high self-esteem, while valuing themselves, always does so from a realistic perspective. She is thus aware of both her virtues and her faults, and does not try to camouflage these in order to pretend to be what she is not. On the contrary, she accepts them and if something gives her problems or difficulties, she tries to find a solution.

2. Worrying about yourself and others

The difference between self-esteem and ego can be seen very clearly in this second point. Someone with an ego will always worry about themselves, but never about others. He needs to be the center of attention, to be the center of attention. And if not, if he feels ignored, one of his reactions is anger.

On the other hand, a person with good self-esteem worries about himself, but also about others. Therefore, unlike someone with an ego, she knows how to listen and does not seek to be the center of attention. A person with good self-esteem knows very well what empathy is and has much more rewarding relationships.

3. See beyond our beliefs

When we are dealing with  a person who has an ego, the first thing we perceive is that they are unable to see beyond their own beliefs. It will be impossible to wait for her to question them or question them. She believes that her vision is the only valid one, which generates many conflicts with others.

However,  a person with good self-esteem is able to look beyond their point of view. She knows that her vision is not the only one and understands that others can have different perspectives, and even take an interest in them. Knowing how to listen, putting yourself in the other’s shoes and being able to gain a new perspective on a given situation makes these relationships with others healthy and rewarding.

As we can see,  a clear difference between self esteem and ego is that the person with ego can never empathize or put themselves in other people’s shoes. This is the reason why it is necessary to have strong and healthy self-esteem. Indeed, a person with an ego does not love or respect himself. All she does is cover up and hide what doesn’t interest her. This is why it is so difficult for him to see beyond.

4. Difficulty accepting criticism

A person with an ego will not stand to receive a single criticism that goes against their exaggerated and distorted image of themselves. To the extent that she has hidden her flaws under this mask of grandeur, any signal that can bring them to light will result in her becoming defensive, angry and causing her to blame others.

In contrast, people  who enjoy healthy self-esteem will be able to recognize their flaws and receive criticism that will help them improve. They will not take it as something negative, but may even appreciate it. Obviously, as long as it is constructive criticism.

5. Expect to receive something in return

We have seen that a person with an ego always thinks of himself. Therefore, if this person asks for help from others or approaches it with an interest, it is because he can find personal benefit in it. If they cannot get something positive out of it, the person with an ego will not speak to others.

A person with healthy self-esteem does not do this because they do not use others to achieve their own goals. She knows that thanks to others she has the possibility to grow. Someone with good self-esteem never does things out of self-interest.

6. The hierarchy between people

Another big difference between self-esteem and ego is that  someone with an ego thinks they are above others. It can be so either because he considers himself superior in strength, intelligence or beauty, among other things. Plus, he believes the world revolves around him.

A person with good self-esteem, on the other hand, knows that no one is superior to another, just that they are different. Therefore, they generally do not make comparisons.

7. To give we must first give ourselves

The last of the differences between self-esteem and ego that we are going to address here relates to this belief of having to meet the needs of others first. However, we must realize that we cannot give what we do not have.

So, those  with an ego cannot love healthily or cover the needs of others since they did not cover theirs in the first place. This is why their life is made up of constant attempts to pretend, to cover up, to believe themselves the best …

This does not happen with people who have good self-esteem. They respect each other, they accept each other, they value each other and they love each other. They can therefore have very rewarding relationships. They are not selfish, they learn what they need and then pass it on to others.

All of them, on occasion, have fallen into the clutches of the ego. Identifying it instead of denying it and looking it in the face will allow us to realize that it may be hiding self-esteem issues.

We do not consider ourselves sufficiently capable? What makes us insecure? Why do we want others to pay attention to us? Let’s think about it. N ou can not have both the ego and high self esteem.

Our thoughts

In the following article, we are going to tell you the difference between self-centeredness and self-esteem, so that you don’t confuse these two …