Does The Romeo And Juliet Effect Exist?
Romeo and Juliet is a work by famous playwright Shakespeare that tells the story of a loving couple struggling with a set of complications that prevent them from being together. Despite their best efforts, they both end up killing each other. It is a great tragedy as you can see.
However, this impulse to move forward together despite everything, and even to choose death rather than being separated, conditions many couples. This is called the Romeo and Juliet effect.
Efforts, difficulties and struggle are ingredients which, instead of leading the partners to make the decision to go their separate ways and live on their own, become firewood used to rekindle the fire of the passion present in the world. start. They need these ingredients to feel feelings for the other person.
And if these ingredients are missing, they think they are no longer in love. As much as it sounds absurd, there is a reason.
Dopamine present in the Romeo and Juliet effect
We know that the habits of couples whose relationship is conditioned by the Romeo and Juliet effect are in fact governed by dopamine. A neurotransmitter which participates in the regulation of certain functions such as emotivity and affectivity. When an unfavorable situation arises, such as those experienced by Romeo and Juliet, dopamine increases.
The fact that the family opposes the union of the lovers, that they have to marry in secret, and then separate in a forced way, generates a biochemical tension which, in a way, becomes addictive. All of these events only increase the production of dopamine. This leads to a series of consequences that only fuel the passion between lovers:
- Greater opposition to adversities: the problems that arise and that try to separate the couple only bring out new strategies to cope with them.
- A strong attachment: attachment and the excessive feeling of wanting to be together increases more and more with each problem that arises and tries to separate the couple.
“I’d rather die now than prolong my death if I don’t have your love.”
– Romeo and Juliet –
Disenchantment in the Romeo and Juliet effect
It is clear that in the case of Romeo and Juliet, the outcome is terrible. But the doubt arises: what would have happened if they had not killed themselves?
They would likely continue to struggle against the constant attempts at separation from their families. However, if their family was gone, they would certainly experience what is called disenchantment.
This is what happens with many couples who suffer from the Romeo and Juliet effect. As soon as problems are no longer in their relationship, two things can happen: they make them up by generating absurd arguments, or they break the relationship because they start to get bored.
Before, the couple was everything, they took all the attention. However, when dopamine is no longer present, things change. Therefore, partners begin to look for other people with whom they can experience this dopamine surge again.
Dopamine addiction
Many people are addicted to dopamine. They are unable to be in a relationship if there are no issues, difficulties and situations that give them this feeling of euphoria and excitement. This is a real problem, because they tend to believe that love is that: struggle and constant effort.
If, in addition, in certain circumstances, third parties try to separate them, that is even better. Even so, while this sometimes energizes the relationship at first, it can also end up exhausting itself.
“Then, love turned into doubt: there was only one goodbye, an unforgettable farewell.”
– Anna Bahena –
We may have already experienced the Romeo and Juliet effect. Or that we have seen it in other people. Either way, this type of relationship is not healthy.
Indeed, what should push two people to be together are not the problems, but rather the tranquility and well-being that comes from creating a balanced life together. And you, have you ever experienced a relationship under the Romeo and Juliet effect?
Our thoughts One of William Shakespeare’s great achievements is to enrich the English language. He is, for example, at the origin of the expression “fall i …
