Take Some Distance: Put Things Into Perspective To Find New Perspectives
Sometimes we need it: to take some distance, but not to get away from everyone and everything. We do it to see ourselves from a different perspective, to let go of this rusty, apathetic “me”. We need to give ourselves a new impulse, to find from emptiness or distance those hidden forces which must again be awakened and reoriented.
To understand this idea, let’s think of a very simple thing that we do every day: lift our eyes and fix them on a specific point in the sky, in our city, in a park. In the distance. Experts in work ergonomics remind us, for example, that it is recommended to look away from our computer every 15 or 20 minutes and focus on another point.
This visual distance generates great rest. In addition, taking a distance from ourselves, at a specific time, also causes psychological and emotional well-being. However, how do we get away from ourselves? Wherever we go, our thoughts, our essence and the weight of our entire existence remain there, like too heavy baggage, like an incessant noise that prevents us from thinking clearly.
It is not necessary to travel to Tibet or go on a week-long retreat in total silence to find new perspectives, to free ourselves from our own “me” and to have a conversation with him…
Take the distance to find us
Some people think that taking a distance means going on vacation. That the problems lose their force and their intensity with a week in thalassotherapy, with a few days on a beach, near turquoise water. In reality, with these intervals of placid rest, we often just slip away. However, nothing is resolved when we press the “pause” button in a heavenly place where we refuse to think.
Taking a distance does not mean running away or putting as many kilometers as possible between us and what bothers us or makes us lose our calm. Not if, in the end, we end up at the same point. Lao Tzu said that, in reality, there is no greater distance than that which we ourselves establish between our head and our heart. In other words, between what our mind persists in believing and what our heart asks of us.
So, if there is one thing that we do frequently, it is to persist in following up on situations which, instead of enriching us personally, ruin any opportunity for happiness. A job, a relationship, a family circle, all these things are contexts in which, very often, we remain silent and remain stuck to negative dynamics. We have put so much distance between ourselves and our real necessities that what we urgently need is not a one-off trip or getaway. We need to find ourselves with ourselves.
Learn to look at us from a distance
We must learn to take a distance to find ourselves, to see life from another perspective. Viktor Frankl, father of logotherapy and survivor of several German concentration camps, explains this to us in his book The Doctor and the soul. From time to time it is necessary to give shape to a space of detachment with what surrounds us to regain our sense of freedom, our potential and also to remember our goals.
Most of the time, we are trapped in our own thoughts. This place is like a prison without windows, a hostile environment that prevents us from knowing what is outside. Therefore, and to facilitate this detachment which we have just spoken about, it is necessary to make contact with our emotions to find sufficient impetus and achieve change.
Here are some steps that would help achieve this result, shape that personal distancing, and find greater inner clarity.
Establish a distance from yourself to make decisions
Determining a position of observation of one’s being is a therapeutic strategy that can be of great use to us. It consists of climbing a few steps to be able to gain height and look at us with perspective, in a loving, warm and humble way. It’s like a game that turns us into self-observers to reflect on the stage of life we are going through. It lets us know what we want to do with our existence.
- Go to the balcony of your consciousness to look at yourself from above, with a distance. Ask yourself if you like what you see, if you would like to see yourself the same way in a year from now.
- Reflect on your beliefs and judgments without the classic ego defenses, without those certainties that others have instilled in us and which, in a way, have long limited us.
- Review the style of your thoughts, place a negativity detector to see if the lens you apply to your reality is characterized by constant discomfort, hopelessness, crankiness and apathy.
If we don’t like what we see from the place we are in, if all we notice is the noise of negativity and unhappiness, it will be time to think about some changes. However, these changes will need to be orchestrated by our goals. As Viktor Frankl told us, we must be able to find meaning in our existence and reorient it towards that goal.
So let’s not hesitate, from time to time, to take some distance from everything that surrounds us in order to reach new perspectives. To remind us who we are and what motivates us.
Our thoughts Through the development of this ability, we are able to embrace the reality of things, which is healing and transformative to all …
